I still don’t get, what are we supposed to do? where’s the series?
It’s right here in the comments section!
Also, I think that you could easily cheat, since one dude could have more than one e-mail.
toonhole.com/caption2016 just goes to the homepage – can’t see a competition page anywhere 🙁
you right. Fixed. thumbsup.jpg
Cool, no worries 🙂
“The shamrock burger is made with 100% real leprechaun meat.”
By the way, it’s vegan.
I do love this one you’ve created.
I get lots o’ laughs.
GL friend, even though I don’t know you.
“yessir! I literally put my blood, sweat and tears into every burger I make.”
“We recycle these buns if you puke them out..”
“Why yes, I will vote for Trump”
The menu said “Aged-beef”. We don’t know why that always seems to confuse the new customers.
Yeah, I have the best tasting shit around.
You know why my bar is so close to an abortion clinic? Cheap veal.
You always wanted to be more like your twin brother? Well, you are what you eat they say.
“Do you like my secret sauce, I made it myself.”
“So what do you think of my special salty sauce? I did it by hand you know.”
” of course my vegan sandwiches look good ! It’s 100% premium ground vegan meat ! “
I replaced my nose with a cat’s paw
“You like my new recipe? I call them soylent burgers. Some friends helped me with the ingredients.”
oh you must be tasting the fresh fromunda cheese, that’s the secret you know!
Your chili is coming right up, mama
“Oh come on man! She swallows, why can’t you?”
“Great texture and taste you say?
Didnt know the oil from my face worked so well” Budget cuts.
“That burger came from my great aunt Lily; her death has been devastating on the family, but great for business!”
Thank God, Ted Cruz just won the presidential election!
” I’ll give you five bucks to leave a positive review on Yelp if you promise not to barf “
“So, what do you guys think of Toonhole.com?”
Aaaaand we have a winner!
“The secret ingredient is my ‘love’!”
My mistake, I thought you ordered the Hambooger.
Today’s special is roadkill and flies…I mean fries!
and here’s some more text because my submission didn’t meet the 15-character comment minimum
Why won`t you throw up already? I need to make another portion for your lady-friend.
I am a social justice warrior.
The secret ingredient is love…
I didn’t knew you like dating black transexuals too
I would like to refrase it as “i didn’t knew you were into black transexuals” . My english is a little poor sorry
“This is my famous intestine burger”
“And that right there’s the *other* reason I call it the Yak Burger.”
You’ll never guess how much money I save by unplugging the fridge every night.
“And that’s why I call it the modest proposal burger.”
“I use only 100% kosher foreskins”
“Hey babe, now that you’re single, how do you feel about THIS hunk of meat?”
“Why yes, those are veggie burgers. Made from vegetarians.”
“you said you wanted it extra greasy, you didn’t specify the type of grease!
You know, I feel cyanide leaves the perfect nutty aftertaste.
“About time you crawled out from under that rock; guess who just got elected president?”
“I came up with the recipe for that burger while eating out your mother.”
“I came up with the recipe for that burger while eating out your grandmother.”
“It’s a new vegetarian recipe; I came up with it while tossing your dad’s salad!”
“Yup, you wouldnt find a burger made from crushed ants in any of those fancy new-age burger shops. It’s my secret recipe!”
“Doesn’t everything taste better with a garnish of alfalfa sprouts?”
“Durrr… what do you think’s IN the burger?”
“It’s not just good for people – it is people…”
“So what ya think about my Burger? I made it with blood, sweat and tears… Literally”
“Belinda is revolted when she realizes the cook is flipping burgers with a meat cleaver. The complete lack of proper cookware is disgusting!”
Soylent Green is People
“If you thought the Burgers were bad, Wait til you see how I make the Curly fries.”
“Cow, Horse, Dog, Orphans… Meat is meat.”
That’s not mayo, that’s “love”
Yeah, I just switched to non-GMO.
Where’s the beef? About the lower intestine by now. Just like your infant son!
Of course I’d rather go commando, but then what would hold the burgers in place until they’re thawed?
Oh did I say we were farm to table? My mistake.
An that’s why I’s named it “Funs with Buns”!
Chef: “I just got these assless jeans on sale, aren’t they hot?”
“Before serving that I put my meat between your buns, and your meat between mine…”
Before the sunburn made my skin peel, my burgers didn’t have a bacon flavor. Wonder if I should be charging extra?
“See? That’s how vegan burgers taste.”
Guess the kind of meat and I’ll give you a second worm burger.
“yeah, it really is amazing how long meat can keep on the side of the road”
“So long story short, I’m saving money and helping the local dog shelters at the same time.”
That oil is allllll natural 😉
“Well that’s funny, I thought you Muslims weren’t allowed to eat pork…”
… or a more subtle version: “Welcome to Hal Al’s: home of the all-you-can-eat pork burgers”
“Oh, by the way, the Toon Hole Gang prepped the burgers this morning.”
Ah I see you’ve tasted the secret ingredient
Could you tell the fries were made with fauxtato?
Made with 100% organic BUNS.
“That’s weird, you haven’t even taken a bite of your food yet.”
Another satisfied customer
“…and that’s when I came. Speaking of which, how is your Gram?”
Cow foreskin is still meat
Well, let me explain . . . surely you have heard of civet coffee . . .
This is why you never trust a butcher that is said to have human flesh in his hamburgers.
You think the thick meat is good? Wait ’till you hit the special sauce.
“Can you believe I found this box of burgers lying in the street?”
“Best before dates are just suggestions”
“The box said ‘2/4/16’, so it’s just a few days old”
” Nah, We don’t need no dye for the green buns. We get ’em that way.”
“People just don’t understand the health benefits of Carrion these days.”
Of course the meat squeals before killing it. We only use fresh ingredients you know.
My caption is:
“… and finally I found a way to get rid of all that cockroaches I had in the kitchen!”
The secret to made from scratch is not bathing for a few days! Really brings out the flavor.
Pretty Patties are great, aren’t they?
“Well, what did you expect? That guy trespassed on my property, and now he won’t anymore!Oh yeah, that burger’s $2 extra.”
“And that’s how we got our secret recipe for our famous ‘Throw Down’ burger.”
The girl is mine.
This is my caption:
Why I named it The Special Salad Burguer if doesn’t have any lettuce in it? Well ma’am, that’s coz I used the meat to “toss my salad”, if ya know what I mean… *wink*
“We were not well acquainted at the time that I cleaved her.”
“Hey boy, you wanna see how I make the pink slime?”
Rectum? Yup, and cooked him too!
“I can’t believe it’s Tuesday”
“Its been so busy, I usually just bath in the sink.”
This one’s called the Castrate Burger. Keep it in and it’s on the house!
I make the grease myself. . .
How’s your abortion burger ?
And that’s when we decided to name the place Ralph’s….
“I told you my burgers would make you green with envy.”
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
Nice copy/paste skills
When you see your Lunch Man’s Butt for the first time
“And that’s my idea for a movie where Batman fights Superman.”
“You put your dog to sleep last week? Was it a big brown one? This really is a small, small world.”
“Times were good at Salmonella Joe’s ever since vomit was accidentally written in as the new currency.”
“Now Danny I heard its your birthday so I dug up your old dog Carl and made him into a sandwich, just for you. And just as a surprise the crunchy parts were the ants that were eating at his flesh. Enjoy.”
“Told you the Soylent burgers would make you a little green.”
Yeah I know, these buns are hot!
… and that’s how the buns got their greenish color!
“And right there is the infection where I scrape the yeast off to make the 100% hand made buns.”
“I don’t know why you’re complaining. That burger was perfectly good the first time ’round”
The sauce may be salty, but it’s organic, natural, and fresh from the source.
“Bio-vegi-burger-glutenfree, with love, and a bit of myself.”
“Yeah, a lot of folks told me it’s weird to work both here and at the Vet, but they don’t know the perks of it. By the way, sorry about your dog man…”
“And that’s why it’s called the “Breaking Bad” burger!”
That’s pretty clever
“I made tha mayonnaise ma’self”
“I know it can be unsettling, but for the finest burgers I have to cook the freshest meat. And what’s fresher than live?”
“A man is only as good as his product, so I’m about 30% high-quality beef and 70% fresh rat.”
“‘no veggies’, eh? well LUTTUCE help you with that!”
Donald Trump 2016
My special ingredient is Potassium Cyanide.
How does that Asperger taste?
“Relax, nobody *significant* has ever died at this place!”
“Ha!, You can barely taste the shit in the nails of the bum that went in that burguer”
“NY Times food critic, huh? Not for long.”
“We’ve never served the Slow-and-Painful” burger option here at Al’s ‘Suicide Assist Cafe’ before!”
“Did you know that hamburger meat isn’t made out of people from Hamburg?”
It is my finest work
When you realize the cook was the one you just saw plunging the toilets.
“I saved so much money by switching to dog meat”
“Hope you enjoy our potluck buffet today! I will keep the leash, if you don’t mind.”
“Thanks, these new butt-window pants are so empowering!”
“We actually started serving homos again recently, check the menu”
“Yes, I do put the ham between the buns.”
“And that was the last time Chris tried the chefs special meatball sauce”
NOBODY cares about the “one entry per email” bull. Nobody. Except for the pussies who paid attention; they’re slaves to convention.
here’s my entry:
”do you like my burgers? the secret is in the ”special sauce”; i make it with my own spit, sweat and a dash of mustard!”
Cook: “Enjoying dat ass…?”
Cook: “Enjoying dat ass… eehuhuh”
“I’m trans” ““““
“Sometimes the special of the day isn’t so special.”
“If you think it tastes good now going in, see how you like it in a few hours.”
I beat my meat real good before grillin’ time
Now ask me what kind of cheese I use…hint, it’s not feta.
Well, he did order the shit on a shingle.
“..I calls it recyclin’!”
“Don’t worry, s’aint a shit stain!”
“…And I’ve got to thank my own rear end for helping me make this special recipe”
Cook: ‘By the way, you can get the antidote if you give me a good tip.”
Thanks really helpful. Will certainly share site with my pals
“Remember, no refund.”
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